SUFFERING
FROM AN OUTBREAK OF THE WALKING DEAD?
TRY
THESE SURVIVAL TIPS!
Social
Response Stages to Zombie Outbreak Scenario
1)
Media Response
2)
General Disbelief
3)
Scapegoating of Corporations, Government, Minority groups, etc.
4)
Media Saturation of False Information.
5)
Mass Panic
6)
Mass Migration From Key Population Zones
7)
Zombie Population Critical Mass. Zombie Swarms Appear.
8)
Organized Response
9)
Disposal of Corpses and Cleanup.
10)
Government Cover-up Operations Begin.
1) Don't
leave your house! I know you need milk, and the grocery is just
down the street, but you should not leave your home during an
outbreak of flesh-eating zombies. Only as a last-ditch option,
should you venture from the confines of your home to confront
the horrors outside. Stay indoors and remember the THREE "F"s!
FORTIFY, FEND-OFF, and...FLAMETHROWER!
2) Choose
the weapon that is right for you. If you are lean of arm and
shoulder, then perhaps a chainsaw is not the correct choice
for you. Look instead to weapons that fit your frame and ability,
such as a handgun with alot of penetration, such as the .40
Baby Eagle. If you happen to be a beefhouse of muscle, then
a melee weapon will suit you just fine for close encounters.
Remember: anything can be a weapon in the right hands. Take
a shovel out for a test run! Smash a few heads! See what fits
you best. It is also wise to procure a rifle with a high accuracy
rating for which to pick off Zombies from a distance.
3) Remember
the Zombie Survivalist Mantra: "Aim For The Head!"
It is common belief that severe head trauma is the only way
to dispose of an animated corpse. This is not a documented fact!
There has never been written documentation of an outbreak survivor
effectively dispatching a restless dead by inflicting massive
cranial damage. That being said, it is still the most likely
course of action that may keep you from being devoured. The
unknown cause of Zombism must activate the brain enough to cause
it to begin the chemical and bioelectric reactions necessary
to move the musculature. These biological reactions take place
in the brain. We see the typical zombie behavior mimics a very
animalistic drive: hunt, eat, and repeat. I am quite sure it
is only a matter of time before we see one of these filthy things
following the base animal instinct to mate. Zombies that hump
things may be the most disturbing concept I can conceive. Since
these motor functions are dictated by the brain, then it would
make sense that destruction of the brain would cause all locomotion
to cease. Aim For The Head.
4) Make
a short list of the people who you would put your life in danger
for. Take that list and cut it in half by whatever means you
must. Your "Assist List" must have no more than five(5)
people on it. This is the maximum amount of aid you can supply
before a Zombie Outbreak Scenario reaches it's most dangerous
boiling point. You must have everyone on you "Assist List"
secure, armed, and in one place before this happens. You shouldn't
worry about other people on your list having lists of their
own. Chances are good that they will be completely unprepared,
bewildered, and open to your leadership. These people will serve
a dual purpose. a) They will give you a reason to survive. b)
They will serve as cattle should you need to use them as Zombie
Bait.
5) Be a
squirrel. Store some nuts. Have a stockpile of hard rations
that will feed you and your "Assist List" for one
month. There should be no need to use comfort room for rations
beyond a month. Rescue and appropriate government cover-up operations
should reach you by then. If you are facing a large-scale outbreak,
perhaps even an apocalyptic scenario, then the level of the
outbreak will have died down enough by the time your rations
are depleted for you to begin foraging.
6) Movement
can save your life. Multiple safehouses may be an excellent
decision, barring a lack of finances. These safehouses can even
be set up during the initial stages of outbreak right after
the panic phase sets in. This is the best time to cautiously
complete your preparations, due to an absence of official police
presence and the recent removal of human residents from most
locations. Your survival preparations can extend past the first
appearance of undead in your region, just so long as the initial
outbreak hasn't quite reached into your immediate area or so
long as the individual zombies have not yet begun grouping together
into swarms yet. When swarms are reported or sighted, you must
have all of your long-term planning complete and be ready to
settle down for a long siege.
7) Survival
of the Fittest must become your new religion. God has abandoned
humanity, so you must begin thinking of yourself as the pinnacle
of the food chain. Zombies might be hunting you, but you are
smarter, stronger, and faster than any reanimated corpse. Use
this knowledge to boost your confidence, because you will not
last long in an outbreak scenario if you lack the confidence
to initialize your plans. No matter how many people you've gathered
around yourself, YOU are the only person that you can rely on
to keep you alive.
8) Forage
smarter, not harder. When the time comes for you to venture
forth from your safehouse to procure more rations, potable water,
and/or ammunition; you should plan your mission in advance.
You should have extensive knowledge of the region, so you should
mark key locations that are likely to have the items on your
"shopping list". Take note that many public locations
(grocery stores, pawn shops, etc.) will have already been looted.
These areas might not have been picked clean, but you should
save them for last since they will likely have a strong zombie
presence. Focus on rich neighborhoods first, since you will
only have to destroy 1 to 5 zombies when you clear the house
for proper foraging.
9) Remember
the buddy system! Always take a buddy everywhere you go. If
no buddy is available, then a well-trained dog will substitute,
although poorly. This is to ensure that there will be someone
present to assist you should you become grappled during an outing
beyond the safety of the safehouse. Also, your buddy can do
you the favor of dispatching you if you should become infected.
This is the best token of friendship a person can offer. Existence
in unlife is the worst fate imaginable.
10) Remain
detached. Do not form close bonds with those around you, should
the need arise to put them down if they are infected. Casualties
are almost certain in an Outbreak Scenario, and grief will kill
you as surely as a bullet or a bite. You may also have to make
a decision of saving your own life at the cost of someone else's.
This is the worst possible scenario, but a very possible one.
Before an outbreak ever happens, you must make peace with the
fact that you are the most important person in the world and
you MUST survive at all cost. Your own progeny are the only
exception to this rule.
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